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Sunday, October 31, 2010

Since it's Halloween

I'll tell you my one scary story. at one point in my youth, I lived in a dirthole apartment in downtown St. John's, across from the Kirk. The Kirk is oh, we'll say Anglican, but I'm not positive, and I lived on the corner of Long's Hill and Livingston streets.

It was a second floor apartment, and needed a key to get in the main door, and a different key to get in to my apartment, and there was only one other family (ooohh, sketchy, let me tell ya) that had a key to the main door. So weird stuff went down while I lived there, first run of the mill weird stuff - the tv would turn off with no one near it, or the remote control. The dvd player would shut off, but the tv wouldn't, so there would be this sudden blaring of static. Then the cats started acting weird. The two of them would sit in front of this one bare wall and just scream. Gave me the fucking willies to tell the truth.

This is the freaky bit. There was one day i came home from work and got in the shower. This place was seriously old, and the bathroom door always stuck, you had to throw your weight into it to open it. So I was in the shower, and I could hear a man humming. I just assumed it was my boyfriend, though I did think it was strange that he didn't tell me he was home. Then the bathroom door opened and I heard something drop  into the sink, something small and metal. The bathroom door closed, and again I heard a man humming. I took my time, cause I wasn't concerned at that point. But when I got out of the shower, there was no one home. There was no music on, and there were no windows open. No men lived downstairs. There was nothing in the sink, let alone something small and metallic.

I thought all of that was pretty strange, but I would just ask my bf about it whenever he got back. He came home several hours later, and had been so far out of the city, that theres no chance it could have been him. Naturally, I lost my ever loving mind.

I did some research (and I was doing a Folklore and Supernatural course at the time), and it turns out that when the Catholics came to Newfoundland back in 18whatever, they dug up all the bodies from the Anglican cemetery to bury them in a Catholic one. they stacked the bodies like cordwood on the corner of Long's Hill and Livingston, and a bunch of people caught diseases from the dead bodies and bit it in my building.

That certainly explained why the haunted hike had a stop under my window every night.

True story.
Happy Halloween!

The Help

Thursday, October 28, 2010

Taken 'er easy tonight

Finished my last (ish) mid-term today. It was such a hot mess, I don't even wanna talk about it, but I came out, if not unscathed, at least alive.

Tomorrow is my fella's birthday, and I swear to God, I'm more excited about it then he is. I think birthdays are important, I think it's important to recognise how glad we all are that you were borned on this very day. I love my birthday, I get all dressed up every year  - a shin dig lovingly referred to as the Messy Dressy (we get dressed up, and then get right messy. RIGHT messy.) Last year, I got home two days after I left my apartment. Well, at least the pictures are hilarious. I'm not going to tell you about any of the things that I'm doing or giving him for his birthday until after, in case he reads this tonight.

So now, I wrap gifts, while listening to old Pearl Jam, and think about how very lucky I am to be on this side of the dirt after the hellish week I've had. Shit's ok man.

The Help

Wednesday, October 27, 2010

Several of my friends have recently mentioned the fact that I never do anything anymore. It is so true. I really miss my old life sometimes. But it's midterms, and I gotta keep my average up, and beyond all of that theres days I don't have time to shower, let alone be a social butterfly. But I miss it.

I did some calculations, and it turns out that in the last 8 weeks, I've had exactly three days without either work or school. There's been lots of days with one or the other, but only three without both. IN EIGHT WEEKS. I think we should all consider ourselves lucky that I haven't lit anyone on fire (don't think I haven't thought about it, oh no, I'm just biding my time, mwahahahaha). And considering this, I'm doing pretty good you know. My grades are still good, I haven't told any idiots what idiots they are, my man is still my man......there's defiantly some downfalls though. I sat and bawled like a little girl yesterday, because I was just so tired, I couldn't comprehend the idea of getting up and giving a presentation after just finishing a midterm, and then going in to work for 8 hours. But the girls in my class rallied around me, I gave the presentation (and got 100% on it) and got in to work, acting like nothing ever happened. My fella gave me the greatest pep talk, and reminded me of how soon this vacation is coming. I am so blessed.

I would like to apologise to everyone for my disappearance, it's not a lack of love my darlings, it's a lack of hours. I'm sorry to all the people who I've not had the time to email (Miss C, my weensy lawyer friend, I love you). I want to thank the Choiring Squad for making my life.

For the love of God, go hug a nurse, they went through hell for you. And if you want your throat to go un-punched, don't tell me I look tired.

The Help

Sunday, October 24, 2010

Things that go "Holy Fuck!" in the night

One night last week, we were graced with a pretty awesome wind storm. I love this stuff, it reminds me of home. I was all tucked up in my living room, making jewelry, drinking wine, watching Friends, when the room started shaking. Now, I live in an apartment building, so that's a pretty impressive wind.

Then it start shaking worse. Then it sounded like, we'll say, a jet plane was flying about a foot over my apartment. I was worried that not only were my windows were gonna break, but that I was gonna die. My man and I kinda looked at each other for a minute, and I was like "you'd tell me if it was the end of the world right?" SAVE THE GUITARS!!!! And then a moment later, a giant crash, that again shook the place. My fella was all excited, and grabbed his camera to go outside. I was ready to tunnel into the earth until the end of days. So maybe our priorities are a little different.

Turns out the roof ripped  up, right above my apartment, and then came crashing down on the other side of the building (thus explaining the second crash). No big deal.

And for the rest of the evening, the storm raged. It sounded like it was raging right in my bedroom, which was actually pretty cool. I slept like a baby.

There's no place like home.
The Help

Thursday, October 21, 2010

And now for something completely different

We had psychology class today, and our instructor brought in a speaker, a psychologist who lives and works in the neighbourhood. Dude uses HYPNOTHERAPY. I went and got hypnotized out of it, for serious!

I should say before I tell you about this, I thought up until this morning, that hypnosis was a joke. I've gone to see several entertainment style hypnotists, and I was never able to go under, cause every time I was thinking  "ha ha, you're not going to make ME squawk like a chicken Chuckles", and I would always be sent back to my seat to watch everyone left on stage humiliate themselves.

You can imagine what I thought of hypnotherapy (quack, quack). But he explained a bunch of different ways that every one's minds work, and proved it over and over in these little group exercises, it was wild. And then he told us he was going to hypnotize us all. Alriiiiiiight.

So he turned on some hippie, earthy, chimy music, and started with the process. It sounded exactly like you think it would, just like in the movies. So he's leading us down, down, and all I can think is - this isn't working. Then I realised I couldn't raise my hand off of my lap. My head was tipped forward so far, I practically had my forehead on my desk. So then I decided to just frig off with the thinking and roll with it. What an experience! I remember every moment. Every time my thoughts started to run away again, I would repeat "calm and relaxed" and every time I thought this, it was like another blind being drawn, and my mind got darker. Craziness!

He told us to picture some place that makes us happy, and my first thought was my bed (a true testament to how tired I am) - my bed is my one concession to fancy house stuff, my sheets, my pillows, they are all super fancy (meaning expensive) with embroidery, and I could FEEL the embroidery against my cheek. I could feel it. And then he told us to picture someone bringing us our favorite fruit, and I could smell mangos. My mouth watered, and I tried to bite down.

He didn't try and make any of us dance around or make sweet love to our desks. A little while later, he brought us back, and he repeated over and over how we should be feeling relaxed and refreshed and happy when we woke up. When I woke up, I found I was crying - not actually crying, but tears running down my face. My eyes were all puffy like I had slept for 10 hours. I felt like I had slept for three days, and well, I kind felt like I was on drugs.

I FEEL AWESOME! Like my brain totally took his word for it, and tricked my body into thinking that I'm not tired. I don't feel even a little bit tired. I feel totally relaxed and happy, it's amazing.

Of course, I asked him to move in, but he didn't seem that into it.

Imagine feeling like this all the time? I had a midterm today, and I wasn't stressed about it, or during it. I still feel all stretchy and happy and chill.

Long story short (too late) I'm a believer.

The Help

Wednesday, October 20, 2010

Let's have a word

We all know how I feel about idiots. No matter where you go, what you do, how much education you have, how kind you are, what God you believe or don't believe in, there's always gonna be idiots. This is something that I have resigned myself to in my few "adult" years. I hope and pray that most days I'm not one. I know that no matter how much I hope and pray, there's days, I'm an idiot.

Arrrrg, I can't even do it, I'm too tired. Stop being an idiot, and I'll try and do the same k? Teach you're kids respect. Try to stop tearing people down. Hold people accountable for their actions. Be accountable for your own actions. Remember that you ARE NOT the only person in the world, and certainly not the first to go through whatever you are going through. Be nice. Stop making gay jokes, and fat jokes and race jokes, cause even though no one is saying it out loud, you are hurting someone. Every now and again, shut your trap and have a listen to someone else's opinion. Stop buying records and movies tickets of girlfriend beaters and racists.

I'm sorry. I know I'm usually perky, and don't climb up on a soap box, but this stuff is just killing me. The kids killing themselves because of homophobia and bullying, the women being beaten into silence, the rape victims being villinized for getting drunk like everybody else, the beautiful women who hurt themselves to look like everyone else. It breaks my heart.

Maybe I'm just exhausted, so things have been hitting a little harder then usual. I promise, tomorrow, I will write something a little frothier, a little more me. Today, I'm just tired and sad, and a little ashamed of us all.

The Help

Saturday, October 16, 2010

And then before you know it

It'll be Christmas. Halloween was just mentioned to me, and I'm all like, chill out, it's months away. But it's actually TWO WEEKS away. Good Christ, I am ill prepared for time to be whooshing by like this. I have decided that this year, I will not be going to the Legion, as is the norm (never did I think the Royal Canadian Legion would be the pinnacle of my social existence, but there it is), for several reasons, most of which are entitled "last Halloween".

Let me set the scene for you. You pay a zillion dollars for the privilege of being a member of the Legion, and you have to swear to not be a communist, which I find hilarious and insulting at the same time. Screw you pal! I'll be a communist if I feel like it! So I refuse to pay this membershit (a typo and it stays), and non-members have to be signed in. Very exclusive right? Ugh. There is nothing more frightening then when the lights come up on a Friday night at the Legion. So I'd have to find someone to sign me in, but on Halloween, there's very rarely space for non-members - last year I waited 2 and a half hours to get in. In a blizzard. Dressed as a slutty cop.

And then when I finally got in, there was cool decorations, and lots of wild costumes, but otherwise, it was just your average Saturday night at the sleege. Well. Me and 9 of my peeps broke out the Thriller dance in the middle of it all too, but that's another story for another day.

So this year, I'm not doing it. I'm going to be part of a zombie hoard (yes, I'm doing the makeup) and I think I'm going to a friends house for festivities. I bet I'll still have a laugh......Plus! It cost about the same for a BOX of wine (I know, classy right? Wanna smell my box cutter?) as for a bottle at the legion. Discussion closed.

I totally used to be a Legion baby, so I don't when all this "growing up" happened, but I have got no time left for standing around getting trashed and trashing people. My mother must be proud.

The Help

Friday, October 15, 2010

Oh Christ, it's playing. So there's this song by Peter Gabriel - who I am NOT a fan of, by the way - I think it's call The Book of Love, and it frigging kills me every time I hear it. It makes me want to cry, but in the good way. I guess, it kind of fills me up. I've listened to it a hundred million times in my life, but every time, I get goosebumps. And it just randomly came on my ipod playlist. Ooohhh, someone is getting smushied within an inch of their lives tonight.

Though I go on about how lucky I am, and how grateful for goodness, and I'm pretty vocal about lovin those whom I love, I'm not a particularly sappy person. Let me re-phrase that. I tell people how I feel about them (often), I marvel in the wonder of the world and it's works (every day). I remind myself and others to be grateful (for all of it, all of this misery and joy that we are daily bit players in). But I'd like to think that I'm still not a sappy person - I don't cry very often. Perhaps I'm delusional? Perhaps I'm a sap in hardcore clothing?I'm willing to accept this theory.

And now "Do You Realise" by the Flaming Lips is on. This is a pretty sad song disguised as a sappy love song. I get your subterfuge, you silly rock stars. My ipod is getting it right today though, hey?

I don't talk about music very often here, and I don't know why. Music is a giant, important part of my life. I play a bunch of instruments, have since I was a kid and I've been lucky enough to play with some cool groups and neat-o people. People ask all the time who my favorite singer/group is, and my response is invariably something like "what day is it today?" My favorite changes by the hour, by the minute. Today, this week, Florence and the Machine are topping my personal charts, but the Eels are playing right now, and these guys are a good time too. One of my favorite things about music is one minute I'm ready to cry with happiness, the next I'm ready to throttle face-first into a mosh pit.

But now my friends, now is time to dance! M.I.A. it is!

Happy Friday. I hope you get laid tonight.

The Help

Thursday, October 14, 2010

Well that's a first

I slept through my alarm today, missed the first half an hour of my psychology class. Un-freaking-believable, I'm usually so reliable, and maybe a touch anal (do not confirm or deny - keep me happy please), so of course I gave myself a heaping helping of guilt over it, but that doesn't really accomplish much does it? I think the school/work balance is starting to become unbalanced. I will try not to complain too much, but I am so fucking tired, I don't know which way is up. The silver lining of this exhaustion is, everything is hysterically funny.

Well, not everything. I almost smacked someone today who complained about having to work for three hours over the weekend, which is not very nice, nor funny.

This dump fire is AWESOME non? Good God, it smells like, well, nasty shit burning. The air is like a solid, everything reeks, schools are being closed and everyone is headachy and pissed off. And apparently this daily dumping of toxic chemicals into our lovely clean, crisp air is going to last for months and months. Sorry,  to those who don't know what I'm talking about - the dump here in Iqaluit has been burning for several weeks. We're the live action version of the Simpsons, I swear to God. If i see someone rolling away a burning tire, I'm buying a plane ticket somewhere far, far away. I don't know how the fire started, and furthermore, I don't care, I just want it to stop. Now don't be getting all snappy with me - my peeps over at the fire department have done everything they can and then some, it's too big, too much, and that's not their fault.

My last complaint, honest. I tried to make an order from Chapters today, and they have this sweet new deal where the shipping is free for orders over $25. Wonderful. Except the thing I wanted (a crazy little r/c spider thingy for my man for his birthday - I had this image of getting a bunch of them and having a battle royale in my kitchen), but said little spider is not covered under the free shipping rules (obviously) and would cost $40 to send here. What the WHAT?? Miserable sons of.....mutter, mutter......stupid....mutter...jerks. Keep your damn spider, I don't need a battle royale anyways. Huh.

Ok, ok, good news. I've gotten four paper/assignments back, and my average is wicked high. Yay! Choir is going really well. Two months and two days til I get to go SHOPPING and see my darling K (you know who you are my dear).

I got many sweet kisses today. I got to further understand the miricle that is our working bodies. I say it all the time in class - but it really is a wonder, us humans. The stuff we do every day without thinking about it. We are all fragile and perfect, and it's amazing that we have all survived this long. We are all so lucky.

The Help

Friday, October 8, 2010

My theme song

It's by Buck Cherry, and thats all I'm gonna say about that.

I found out today that I have Sunday AND Monday off. Both school AND work. Like seriously, I think I'm just gonna spend those two days wasted. I deserve it right? And further to that, my fella has the SAME two days off. We have never had two days off together before. Either we shall have the best time ever, or we'll end up killing each other. I am now accepting bets as to which it's gonna be (odds heavily in favor of most wonderful, most epic two days ever).

Not really folks, swears. Oh, I'm gonna get drunk, for shizz, but I'll have sober moments in between. Just cause I have a few days off, doesn't mean I can stop studying....I'm already shocked and slightly alarmed at how much I've forgotten so far this semester. But I won't moan about school today, as my average is offensively high right now.

Plus, choir night Monday. How I delight in choir, it makes me so happy. You should hear the mash up we've got cooking at the moment, y'all are gonna die if you ever hear it. I'm not going to give anything away, suffice it to say, we do a great deal of stuff that we probably shouldn't. Alright a little teaser - Led Zepplin is involved in one half of the mash up. Squeeee!!!

Very recently, and good friend's lady friend moved to town, and I can't tell you how this has changed things for me. Up until now, I was forever the lone taco at every sausage fest. I don't know who I felt worse for - all the sausage's, cause I was their only eye candy (MY EYES MY EYES!! THEY BURN!!!!), or the fact that I haven't had a lady friend to shake my head and say "dudes" with when the dudes were acting like dudes. No longer my friends - my darling miss, you know who you are, I am thankful for your arrival.

Other things I am thankful for: Jack Daniels, snow days, Rock Band, beads, new shower heads (heh, perv), the Beatles, sharp cheddar cheese, Dave Chapelle, jello shooters, BACON, Friday nights.

The Help

Wednesday, October 6, 2010

Still love me?

So I've gotten many, many messages in the last 24 hours that say basically the same thing - "Thanks for letting me know about that website, and if we never see each other again you know why. And my husband/wife hates you forever." Did I not tell you the truth dear readers?

I've been thinking about thanksgiving a fair amount, as it is coming up this weekend, and it is my first thanksgiving that I am not cooking for what seems like 100 people. I'm cooking for 2, and man, am I ever excited. I'm going to be the very definition of lazy this Sunday. Turkey in oven, feet on table. Wicked.

Some of the things I'm thankful for: school, my man, Chuck Norris, passion flakies, raindrops on roses and whiskers on kittens, me ma 'n pa, hummus, pink $50 bills, guitars, snow days, 30 Rock, my wonderful and loyal readers, Glee, my blackberry, the friends who say "of course" whenever I propose a crazy scheme that usually involves copious amounts of alcohol and humiliation, George Romero, The Dwarves, living room dance parties, days when no one pees on my steps, coffee, idiots (cause who would I make fun of without them?), Veronica Mars, sweet sweet kisses, my choir, my kick ass sister, Betty White, my chesticles.

I'm sure theres more, but that's all I can think of right now without getting all smushy on you.
I am thankful for every one of you my friends.

The Help

Tuesday, October 5, 2010


Ok, we're gonna approach this slow and quiet - ever heard of www.stumbleupon.com? It's today's slice of fried awesome, and the danger is, unless you've got days and days to waste, you are screwed forever if you go on this site. It's so freaking fun! I was innocently reading texts from last night, and one of the texts mentioned it, so I decided to check it out. Three days later, I emerged, parched, starving, wrist forever ruined from all the clicking. Ok, I'm exaggerating a little, but you get the picture I'm sure. This is how it works: you sign up, tell 'em some stuff that you like, and hit stumble, and the neatest frigging stuff in the world pops up. Serious face, it's such a good time, don't do it unless you've got major time to kill.

In other news, my most awesome instructor gave us lots of extra help in chemistry, and I'm not nearly so screwed. I have four assignments due in the next two weeks, but I handed 'em all in today so I can spend the next two weeks prepping for the chemistry midterm. And because I'm a geek. I got my first assignment back today. It went very, very well.

In other news, I haven't been yelled at in DAYS. And I got many sweet kisses today.

Did you know that this weekend is Thanksgiving? I could hear you clench up just now, heh.

The Help

Sunday, October 3, 2010

My day, so far.

So I woke up to go to work this morning, and the power was out. Fine. I didn't take a shower, cause I didn't want to die in the black hole that is my unlit bathroom.

I get in to work, get yelled at cause of the front door. No power.

I open the office, even though the phone doesn't work, and I'm sitting in a dark office by myself.

All the alarms that go off when the power goes out are buzzing to let me know over and over that the power is out. At least they're doing their job.

I create awesome percussion pieces on my desk, using the ticking of the clock as my back beat.

I get yelled at for the power being out (obviously I work for the power company too).

I get asked 416 times when the power will be back on (again, I don't work at the power company).

I get yelled at because restaurants in the city aren't open (cause I run all the restaurants as well). In the restaurants defense - it's extremely difficult to COOK WITHOUT POWER.

Unconnected to the power being out, I got yelled at because cabs charge people money for driving them places. I wish I was making this up.

And then, after almost three hours of alternately sitting in the dark and getting yelled at, the power came back on. Oh darling power, how I missed you.

These people would all be screwed if it were the zompocolypse.

The Help