Remember when I said big changes were coming?
Let me tell you what's been going on.
I'm on a deferred year at school. When I tell people this, most are completely understanding. Some are overtly judgmental, and one or two (usually strangers, which I find amazing), quiz me on what, and why, and what the new plan is.
This was my choice, and I gotta say, it feels awesome. I feel like a new woman! People comment every day on how much healthier and happier I look.
I am going back. I will be a nurse. Just not right now.
I had some pretty big health stuff happen, that I was having a difficult time with it. I'm getting better, and doing what I can. It's big enough that I don't feel like talking about it here. Calm down, I'm not the kind of sick you're thinking of.
This was a part of my decision to not return to school this year. But really, just a part.
I got a promotion at work. I have never worked so hard, and I have never enjoyed the hard work so much.
Ok, what? I can't even believe I just typed this stuff. Dear Lord, is this what growing up is? Uuuugghh. I hope I don't turn into a perky ponytail - that's those women you see at the fancy grocery store who all wear Lulu Lemon and have perky ponytails, and push ergonomically correct baby strollers, and only buy organic. They probably don't own televisions, and call their man-children Tristan or Andre.
I bet they eat refined sugar in private. How I judge thee, oh Perky Ponytail.
And judgment! I alluded to people judging me for my decision to take a year off of school. The people who I assumed would judge me, didn't; and I was deeply surprised by the people who did.
I could see it on their faces. Raised eyebrows, stumbling to find something nice to say. Visibly physically restraining themselves from asking what the hell I'm doing. There were of course, people who did not restrain themselves, and while I give 'em an A for ballsy tactics, they get an F for social etiquette. I had one woman, a guest at my hotel, quiz me up and down about why I wasn't going to school, what I'm going to do instead and what kind of future I intend to have. Even after I said very clearly that I deferred for personal reasons, and I didn't feel like talking about it, still she continued to grill me.
While I appreciate that people have high hopes for me and my future, if my face is one you see 4 times a year, you do not get to have an insider view of the Help. You get the public face. And you like it!!