Hilarity and Deep Fried Awesome

Have you ever had a touton? It's fried bread dough with butter and molasses, and until you've had some, you don't even know what deep fried awesome is - get a Newfoundlander to make 'em for you, we're the only ones that know how to do it right. One of my favorite cookbooks, called "Fatback and Molasses" is seriously old school Newfoundland, and it seems like all the recipes are written by your Aunt Mildred from Black Duck Cove (I don't actually know anyone from Black Duck Cove, couldn't even tell you where it is on a map, I just like the way those words sound together. Weird? Perhaps). My favorite part isn't the recipes as such, though there are lots of good ones, my favorite part is the instructions for the recipes......my go-to brownie recipe is on page 141, and after listing the ingredients, the reader/chef is instructed to put the batter in a greased baking pan and "bake in the oven until done". Riiiight. The assumption that you just know what the proper temperature is, and also how long it's supposed to bake for, I die at it.

I had a tidbit about some hospitality hilarity here for about 15 seconds til I decided that maybe a tell-all while I'm working here might not be the best plan for my career at this stage. It's too bad cause the story was funny, and such a good example of how people treat the help - like a cross between Aladdin's genie and Mr. Belvedere, with a side order of Whitney Houston's fictional sister in "The Body Guard".

And today, for the first ever slice of deep fried awesome, you should check out www.textsfromlastnight.com. The first day I went on this site, I was engrossed for hours, banging my head on my desk laughing. Like fear of vomit laughing. At one point I had to answer the work phone, and had to give myself a mental slap to stop braying like an idiot. I pick up the phone, and instead of my usual extremely perky, professional greeting, I snorted directly into the phone. Long and loud. It was a proud moment.

Now get back to work. Or have some of The Sex.

Cordially,
The Help