I will have the day off. In fact, starting Wednesday, I won't be working the main job anymore. On Friday, my darling arrives, and I don't have anywhere to be until MONDAY. Holy God, the potential, the cooking I could do! But I'll probs just end up comatose, which is ok too.
I got a lot of texts, and emails, and hugs yesterday. I needed it all. To JD in Ottawa, your note made my day, for real. I may or may not have begun bawling after the second sentence.....details are sketchy, but there wasn't a dry eye in the house. Well, at my desk.
I was delighted too, to learn that many people share in my extreme annoyance with the door thing. I must admit, way more stuff has been pissing me off lately, but this has been a life-long silly little pet peeve of mine. I'm also deeply offended by hipsters (I just wanna rip their insane glasses and Rainbow Bright purses off their pale, skinny bodies), people who skip in line, and Oprah (she knows what she did). Anyone else?
The Help
Sunday, March 27, 2011
Saturday, March 26, 2011
Soooo......
I quit my job. True story. I tried really, really hard, but I couldn't make it all work, there are simply not enough hours in the day. And school has been so gonzo, with promises of it only getting WORSE, BY A LOT in the next few months. Soon after exams end, I'm in the hospital, for 12 hours a day.
Truth is, I haven't been doing great. I was setting aside crying time every day, just like when I had three jobs at once a few years ago. Like, let alone that my school work was suffering, my job was suffering, my relationships were suffering - I was suffering. Feeling on the edge of crazy, didn't know my arse from my elbow, forgetting important stuff, falling asleep in the back of cabs, crazy.
I miss my friends. I miss having a life. I miss being able to stay awake past 10. Look, I know what I signed up for, it's no use rubbing my choices in my face. I'm not saying I can't do it, I'm saying it's really fucking hard. A personal pet peeve - when people, friends, get on my case about my absenteeism. This does not make me want to go out, it makes me want to stay in and hide, and never come out. Putting drinks in my hand will not make me party. Another pet peeve: when I tell people that I'm having a hard time, that I need a little understanding, and the response is invariably, you'll be fine. Buck up soldier.
Not cool.
A completely unconnected pet peeve - Do I ever hate it when perfectly healthy, not-laden-down-with-crap people use those handicap door buttons. I don't know why, but it makes me wanna rip my skin off with annoyance. Recently, I held open one such door for a young man, and AFTER he was through the door, he pushed the button to open the f-ing door. Why? I know why - because this child is so used to slapping the button on the way through, he doesn't know how to not do it. What a sorry statement of our times. People are too lazy to OPEN A DOOR. I'll open your door in a minute kid (whilst staring menacingly at said kid).
Please to tell Dear Help, surely there must be some good news to report? Anything that doesn't make you feel all stabby?
It's true my friends, there is some good news. My darling, my favorite man since my daddy, is coming back to town this week. This week!! It seemed to take years, but it is happening this Friday. And even better news (depending on whether or not you speak to my sainted parents or not), we are moving in together, living in sin if you'd prefer. I'm so freaking excited for this. To have meals together and sleep in if we feel like it, and sit around and watch tv on Sunday afternoons.......le sigh. Yes, it all sounds very sedate, maybe even boring. And I couldn't be happier.
The Help
PS there was a major fire here in Iqaluit this week. 30 families lost everything. So please, think of these people, pray for these people, donate if you can. Thank your lucky stars and whichever god you worship that it wasn't you. Perhaps get renter's insurance?
Truth is, I haven't been doing great. I was setting aside crying time every day, just like when I had three jobs at once a few years ago. Like, let alone that my school work was suffering, my job was suffering, my relationships were suffering - I was suffering. Feeling on the edge of crazy, didn't know my arse from my elbow, forgetting important stuff, falling asleep in the back of cabs, crazy.
I miss my friends. I miss having a life. I miss being able to stay awake past 10. Look, I know what I signed up for, it's no use rubbing my choices in my face. I'm not saying I can't do it, I'm saying it's really fucking hard. A personal pet peeve - when people, friends, get on my case about my absenteeism. This does not make me want to go out, it makes me want to stay in and hide, and never come out. Putting drinks in my hand will not make me party. Another pet peeve: when I tell people that I'm having a hard time, that I need a little understanding, and the response is invariably, you'll be fine. Buck up soldier.
Not cool.
A completely unconnected pet peeve - Do I ever hate it when perfectly healthy, not-laden-down-with-crap people use those handicap door buttons. I don't know why, but it makes me wanna rip my skin off with annoyance. Recently, I held open one such door for a young man, and AFTER he was through the door, he pushed the button to open the f-ing door. Why? I know why - because this child is so used to slapping the button on the way through, he doesn't know how to not do it. What a sorry statement of our times. People are too lazy to OPEN A DOOR. I'll open your door in a minute kid (whilst staring menacingly at said kid).
Please to tell Dear Help, surely there must be some good news to report? Anything that doesn't make you feel all stabby?
It's true my friends, there is some good news. My darling, my favorite man since my daddy, is coming back to town this week. This week!! It seemed to take years, but it is happening this Friday. And even better news (depending on whether or not you speak to my sainted parents or not), we are moving in together, living in sin if you'd prefer. I'm so freaking excited for this. To have meals together and sleep in if we feel like it, and sit around and watch tv on Sunday afternoons.......le sigh. Yes, it all sounds very sedate, maybe even boring. And I couldn't be happier.
The Help
PS there was a major fire here in Iqaluit this week. 30 families lost everything. So please, think of these people, pray for these people, donate if you can. Thank your lucky stars and whichever god you worship that it wasn't you. Perhaps get renter's insurance?
Wednesday, March 2, 2011
Gawd, I'm Terrible
The first little while that I didn't write, it was because I was so tired and stunned by the amount of work I had to do, that I didn't want to just complain. Then the time stretched longer and farther, and then, all of a sudden, I was on vacation again. Craziness. Now it's gotten to the point where I feel guilty for not writing, which is utter madness, cause there are plenty of days I feel like I don't have time to pee.....
But for now, my bladder is empty, and I have much to report.
First, there are only 6 weeks left to school. Holy Bejesus. Where on earth did the time go? I've learned how to do vital signs which is all kinds of neat-o, and have acquired a stethoscope of my very own. In the color of frosted glacier, no less.
The going to part time thing hasn't really worked. I'm working just a few hours less then I was when I was full time, so I am, as ever, completely exhausted.
I got an extremely poor grade back yesterday, my first. I was devastated.
The good stuff - I was able to take a vacation during school's reading week. I finally after a lifetime, got to see my favorite man. Ok, it was only 2 months, but it seemed like a FREAKING LIFETIME. It was so, so good to see him. The days leading up to vacation, I started getting scared and stressed. I was afraid things would be awkward and weird. I was afraid that he forgot what I looked like in the intervening time and wouldn't think I was pretty anymore. I was afraid that the magic would be gone, or lessened. This was so not the case my friends. It was such a wonderful relief to be all wrapped up in him again, and there was no awkwardness, there was nothing but shit happy. It was like I was never gone, we completely picked up where we left off. Le sigh. I am the luckiest.
So we went to Newfoundland. He had never been before, and there was the great event - Meeting The Family. Of course, and possibly for the first time, my family completely fell in love with him. My sister was particularly vocal about this - after a bit of wine, she tells me that she thinks he is the best dude I've ever gone out with. I happen to agree. I brought him to the touristy places that you're supposed to bring mainlanders to, and there were many kisses at red lights. We shopped and ate terrible/awesome food (big shout out to Ches's), we hung out with the family, and babysat the kids. In short, we didn't stop. Of the six days we were on the Rock, it didn't snow for 7 minutes. Yep, we timed it. Seven minutes. There were many many, oh, many, people I didn't get to see. to you, my Newfoundland friends, I'm very sorry, It's not a lack of love, and we'll be back in the summer.
And now for something completely different - are you in love with Mumford and Sons or whaa?
The Help
But for now, my bladder is empty, and I have much to report.
First, there are only 6 weeks left to school. Holy Bejesus. Where on earth did the time go? I've learned how to do vital signs which is all kinds of neat-o, and have acquired a stethoscope of my very own. In the color of frosted glacier, no less.
The going to part time thing hasn't really worked. I'm working just a few hours less then I was when I was full time, so I am, as ever, completely exhausted.
I got an extremely poor grade back yesterday, my first. I was devastated.
The good stuff - I was able to take a vacation during school's reading week. I finally after a lifetime, got to see my favorite man. Ok, it was only 2 months, but it seemed like a FREAKING LIFETIME. It was so, so good to see him. The days leading up to vacation, I started getting scared and stressed. I was afraid things would be awkward and weird. I was afraid that he forgot what I looked like in the intervening time and wouldn't think I was pretty anymore. I was afraid that the magic would be gone, or lessened. This was so not the case my friends. It was such a wonderful relief to be all wrapped up in him again, and there was no awkwardness, there was nothing but shit happy. It was like I was never gone, we completely picked up where we left off. Le sigh. I am the luckiest.
So we went to Newfoundland. He had never been before, and there was the great event - Meeting The Family. Of course, and possibly for the first time, my family completely fell in love with him. My sister was particularly vocal about this - after a bit of wine, she tells me that she thinks he is the best dude I've ever gone out with. I happen to agree. I brought him to the touristy places that you're supposed to bring mainlanders to, and there were many kisses at red lights. We shopped and ate terrible/awesome food (big shout out to Ches's), we hung out with the family, and babysat the kids. In short, we didn't stop. Of the six days we were on the Rock, it didn't snow for 7 minutes. Yep, we timed it. Seven minutes. There were many many, oh, many, people I didn't get to see. to you, my Newfoundland friends, I'm very sorry, It's not a lack of love, and we'll be back in the summer.
And now for something completely different - are you in love with Mumford and Sons or whaa?
The Help
Saturday, January 29, 2011
three more days of madness
So I realized today that I haven't written in a while. I've started to write several times in the last 10 days, and gave it up part way through.....I found that all I was doing was complaining. while that may be a little cathartic for me, I'm pretty sure everyone has a whole life of their own and don't need a dose of my moaning on top of it.
I'm almost completely moved, and I spent my first night in my new place last night. I am so blessed - I put out the call, that I needed help, and half of the city showed up to move my junk from one end to the other. Three and a half years of piled up living took about 45 minutes to move. As a payback, I made 2 giant bowls of "drop kick punch" (as my darling named it), utilizing a bottle of gin AND a bottle of vodka. My, my my. We did indeed get silly drunk. We planned on going to the bar that is now downstairs from my new apartment, but we were having such a great time, we stayed in.
I officially begin part time work tomorrow. I love my job, and I'd like to think that I'm good at it, but holy bejesus, I'm so freaking excited to have a little free time. I may break down and get cable (oooOOooohh), though I'm really only interested in the food network. And Glee.
The whole best new blog business did not work out in my favor, but seriously, I was so surprised and elated to even be thought of, I am a genuine happy chappy. To all of the awesomes who voted for me, thank you so much. I came close my friends, I came close. And the most wonderful thing that came about because of this nomination - I mentioned to my parents that I had been nominated. They were quite surprised, as they didn't even know that I was writing a blog....and I had to explain to my dad what a blog is. They are so good, they read every blog I posted in the one sitting, and while they didn't much appreciate my er, florid language, they had very nice things to say about my writing. Who could ask for more then approval from mom and dad?
My dad noted how much my spelling has improved. I'll explain spell check next time.
The Help
I'm almost completely moved, and I spent my first night in my new place last night. I am so blessed - I put out the call, that I needed help, and half of the city showed up to move my junk from one end to the other. Three and a half years of piled up living took about 45 minutes to move. As a payback, I made 2 giant bowls of "drop kick punch" (as my darling named it), utilizing a bottle of gin AND a bottle of vodka. My, my my. We did indeed get silly drunk. We planned on going to the bar that is now downstairs from my new apartment, but we were having such a great time, we stayed in.
I officially begin part time work tomorrow. I love my job, and I'd like to think that I'm good at it, but holy bejesus, I'm so freaking excited to have a little free time. I may break down and get cable (oooOOooohh), though I'm really only interested in the food network. And Glee.
The whole best new blog business did not work out in my favor, but seriously, I was so surprised and elated to even be thought of, I am a genuine happy chappy. To all of the awesomes who voted for me, thank you so much. I came close my friends, I came close. And the most wonderful thing that came about because of this nomination - I mentioned to my parents that I had been nominated. They were quite surprised, as they didn't even know that I was writing a blog....and I had to explain to my dad what a blog is. They are so good, they read every blog I posted in the one sitting, and while they didn't much appreciate my er, florid language, they had very nice things to say about my writing. Who could ask for more then approval from mom and dad?
My dad noted how much my spelling has improved. I'll explain spell check next time.
The Help
Tuesday, January 18, 2011
I've been having a really good day. In fact, I've been having a really good couple of days. I still don't know where I'm moving (in 2 weeks, eep!), my man is still far, far away, my bestie still continues to not live here, yet, and still, I've been having a good run.
School is awesome. It's wickedly hard, and lots of work, and way more then last semester, and I love every minute of it. We had one of those golden days today, our instructor was so ON that we all understood what he was talking about and we managed to have a lot of laughs too. I have this one instructor for 4 of my 5 courses, and he is very simply, the shit. I've written about him before, but today he was on top of his game.
It's less then a month until my next vacation and seeing my darling again. As soon as it hit the month mark, it didn't seem so bad. I miss him terribly, but the end is in sight. And today, I added an extra day on to the end of my vacation, and shortly after I get back, he will be moving to Iqaluit.
I've downloaded a zillion new musics from itunes, including "Make Me Lose Control" by Eric Carmen. Who? Eric Carmen of amazing feathered hair 80's fame. this song reminds me of my sister, in the best way, and it reminds me of being on the bus from school when I was in grade 6. Is there anything better then hearing a song that makes me so happy after 20 years? Cheesy? Yes please.
Ok, maybe there's one thing better. I was reading a friends blog today (what up Townie Bastard?) and he's been nominated for best blog in the north (again). So I went to the website to vote for him, and it turns out that your friend, The Help, has been nominated for best new blog! Shut your dirty mouth, what?!?
I wish I could describe how good this feels. Even if you don't vote, or don't vote for me, God love ya for reading. God love ya for making me feel this good.
And if you do feel like voting.....
http://kiggavik.typepad.com/the_house_other_arctic_mu/2011/01/voting-round-the-2010-nunies.html
the Help
School is awesome. It's wickedly hard, and lots of work, and way more then last semester, and I love every minute of it. We had one of those golden days today, our instructor was so ON that we all understood what he was talking about and we managed to have a lot of laughs too. I have this one instructor for 4 of my 5 courses, and he is very simply, the shit. I've written about him before, but today he was on top of his game.
It's less then a month until my next vacation and seeing my darling again. As soon as it hit the month mark, it didn't seem so bad. I miss him terribly, but the end is in sight. And today, I added an extra day on to the end of my vacation, and shortly after I get back, he will be moving to Iqaluit.
I've downloaded a zillion new musics from itunes, including "Make Me Lose Control" by Eric Carmen. Who? Eric Carmen of amazing feathered hair 80's fame. this song reminds me of my sister, in the best way, and it reminds me of being on the bus from school when I was in grade 6. Is there anything better then hearing a song that makes me so happy after 20 years? Cheesy? Yes please.
Ok, maybe there's one thing better. I was reading a friends blog today (what up Townie Bastard?) and he's been nominated for best blog in the north (again). So I went to the website to vote for him, and it turns out that your friend, The Help, has been nominated for best new blog! Shut your dirty mouth, what?!?
I wish I could describe how good this feels. Even if you don't vote, or don't vote for me, God love ya for reading. God love ya for making me feel this good.
And if you do feel like voting.....
http://kiggavik.typepad.com/the_house_other_arctic_mu/2011/01/voting-round-the-2010-nunies.html
the Help
Wednesday, January 12, 2011
Holy Upheaval Batman
Things are changing for me, and very quickly. In all honesty, it's giving me a flaming case of the screaming heebee jeebees. I'm used to having a plan, knowing exactly what my next step is, but in a zen way, if that makes any sense. Ok, it doesn't.
Part of living here, of existing in this part of the world, is sort of floating along, and letting things happen. Everything is slow, from customer and government services to internet connections. And it doesn't do anyone any good whatsoever to get all huffy about it. It doesn't get the food to your table any faster, or make anyone answer the phone at 2:04 on a Tuesday afternoon. So to a certain extent, I live like this. I'm cool with it, cause it's the easiest thing to be, and because really, it's nice. Everyone is mellow like an outdoor concert, except without the maryjane. For the most part.
So while I do drift along, I worry enough, and I have enough on my plate, that I have to know where I'm at most of the time. This week, I've lost sight of where I'm at, on so many levels. The first and biggest thing - I have decided to drop from management to regular part time at my job. My school schedule is so very much this semester, I couldn't even survive the first week. This is pretty big for me, I feel like I'm cutting off a bit of myself, and giving it away. Because I'm going to part time, I will obviously be making less money, but I also lose my apartment. Technically speaking, I have nowhere to live in three weeks. Enter screaming heebee jeebees.
Of course, I am surrounded by such wonderful people, no one will let me be homeless. I'm on the student housing list, and we all just have to keep our fingers crossed that housing comes up before then. A dear friend just bought a house, and she tells me I can stay there until student housing happens. I am so lucky.
And the last part of this craziness that is my new life, I decided that I needed to supplement my diminishing paycheck - I'm going back to hosting karaoke. Dear sweet baby Jesus, save me from myself.
The karaoke crowd don't know this information yet. Well, now they do. Cue a million "I told you so" postings.
The Help
Part of living here, of existing in this part of the world, is sort of floating along, and letting things happen. Everything is slow, from customer and government services to internet connections. And it doesn't do anyone any good whatsoever to get all huffy about it. It doesn't get the food to your table any faster, or make anyone answer the phone at 2:04 on a Tuesday afternoon. So to a certain extent, I live like this. I'm cool with it, cause it's the easiest thing to be, and because really, it's nice. Everyone is mellow like an outdoor concert, except without the maryjane. For the most part.
So while I do drift along, I worry enough, and I have enough on my plate, that I have to know where I'm at most of the time. This week, I've lost sight of where I'm at, on so many levels. The first and biggest thing - I have decided to drop from management to regular part time at my job. My school schedule is so very much this semester, I couldn't even survive the first week. This is pretty big for me, I feel like I'm cutting off a bit of myself, and giving it away. Because I'm going to part time, I will obviously be making less money, but I also lose my apartment. Technically speaking, I have nowhere to live in three weeks. Enter screaming heebee jeebees.
Of course, I am surrounded by such wonderful people, no one will let me be homeless. I'm on the student housing list, and we all just have to keep our fingers crossed that housing comes up before then. A dear friend just bought a house, and she tells me I can stay there until student housing happens. I am so lucky.
And the last part of this craziness that is my new life, I decided that I needed to supplement my diminishing paycheck - I'm going back to hosting karaoke. Dear sweet baby Jesus, save me from myself.
The karaoke crowd don't know this information yet. Well, now they do. Cue a million "I told you so" postings.
The Help
Sunday, January 9, 2011
Like a drunken phoenix, I too shall rise from the ash
I've had the last three days off of work, and I only had school long enough to collect my schedule on one of those days. Pray tell Help, what did you do with all of that free time? Begin an advanced basket weaving course? Go to mime school? STUDY?? No (though I should reconsider the mime thing on my next days off), I slept. I did the dishes, and other useful things, but on the whole, I slept. I have this insane idea that if I sleep lots before the semester begins, I won't be so dropping tired this semester? Yeah, crazy. I'm ok with that.
In the short time since I last wrote, a great deal has changed for me. Big changes.
I got my new semester schedule a few days ago, and it is so scary, I could feel my brain freeze. I showed my boss my new schedule, and he asked if I had considered going part time (did I mention how scary the schedule is?). So I have 200 new things to think/worry about, a bunch of decisions and scary what-if's....truth told my friends, I'm scared. I'm scared for all the changes that are coming. I'm a world class worrier, and my skills have certainly been put to the test this week.
So lets talk about something else shall we? I saw the second worst movie ever made last night (in the non-zombie category, man, there are some STINKERS in the zombie category), I think it was called "How can you tell" or "how do you know" or some other poorly thought out crappy title. It had possibilities, a good cast etc, but good God, none of these fools were able to finish a sentence, it was exhausting.
A wonderful, dear friend gave me, I shit you not, ZOMBIE SHOES for Christmas. Got 'em in the mail a few days ago. I cannot express the joy.
And tomorrow, it starts again. Wish me luck.
The Help
In the short time since I last wrote, a great deal has changed for me. Big changes.
I got my new semester schedule a few days ago, and it is so scary, I could feel my brain freeze. I showed my boss my new schedule, and he asked if I had considered going part time (did I mention how scary the schedule is?). So I have 200 new things to think/worry about, a bunch of decisions and scary what-if's....truth told my friends, I'm scared. I'm scared for all the changes that are coming. I'm a world class worrier, and my skills have certainly been put to the test this week.
So lets talk about something else shall we? I saw the second worst movie ever made last night (in the non-zombie category, man, there are some STINKERS in the zombie category), I think it was called "How can you tell" or "how do you know" or some other poorly thought out crappy title. It had possibilities, a good cast etc, but good God, none of these fools were able to finish a sentence, it was exhausting.
A wonderful, dear friend gave me, I shit you not, ZOMBIE SHOES for Christmas. Got 'em in the mail a few days ago. I cannot express the joy.
And tomorrow, it starts again. Wish me luck.
The Help
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